Ranking the Batman Flicks: Part Two

Ok. I've got 45 minutes until SYTYCD is on, and since my ONE reader (Hi Lex!) has voiced his opinion in the comments about what he'd like to see more of, and since I'm only writing this blog in order to win more friends/readers by pleasing others, here it is. Today's your lucky day, kid. ;)

(Really though, I had planned on doing this post anyways as part of my three-post series. It just so happens that I possess the necessary motivation to crank it out tonight)

Anyways....

...Batman, a legendary comic book hero and a silver screen icon that has been played by four different actors. But who did it best? Well, here's what I think (again, the rankings go from best to worst):

1. Michael Keaton, who played the Caped Crusader in the first two Batman films. I know I'm gonna catch a lot of flack for not choosing Christian Bale for the coveted number one slot, but Michael Keaton, to me, embodies everything that Bruce Wayne AND Batman should be. Aloof. Strong. Too cool for school, but in a way that makes you think that he's covering for some sort of shortcoming and also doesn't really know how to act around people. This, plus the fact that Keaton does very little talking as Batman in the first movie give him the edge over Bale.

2. Christian Bale, who played the Dark Knight in the last two Batman films. What lost Bale the top spot for me is the ridiculous way his voice changes when he is in his Batman get-up. I CAN'T STAND the over-affected gruffness and breathiness of it. I know that seems minor, but Bale spends a large part of The Dark Knight as Batman and he has tons of lines. It was totally distracting for me. Still, his eerie (and amazing) performance in Batman Begins gives him the edge over Val Kilmer.

3. Val Kilmer, who played Batman in only one film, Batman Forever. If you followed the old school comics, you know that Bruce Wayne was always sort of a player, big pimpin' women and flossin' with all of his money and cars and fancy shit. Val Kilmer does an excellent job of being that Bruce Wayne, because up until this flick, movie goers had only seen Keaton's Wayne, which was pretty morose and opposite to what he was in the comics. That alone keeps Kilmer out of the bottom spot...plus, he's just so damn good looking, he makes any role a memorable one (for me, at least).

4. George Clooney, who was an utter joke in Batman and Robin. Why he was ever cast in this role, heaven only knows. Everything about his performance sucked. Royally. Maybe if he had been given a semi-decent storyline, he would have risen to the occasion instead of giving a completely unconvincing performance, but unfortunately, that's a moot point. Thank goodness for Oceans Eleven and O Brother Where Art Thou, because Batman and Robin single-handedly could have sunk Clooney's career and relegated him to a lifetime of ER re-runs.

But, of course, all this is just my opinion. What do you think?

Come back soon for my favorite of all of these posts...the villains!!

Ok, so I lied...

In my last post, I said that I'd be back today with more Batman goodness, but a friend's immediate request for DJC's resume has got my writing skills committed elsewhere for tonight.

Sorry 'bout that (although judging by my site stats as of late, no one's reading anyways, so I don't really know who I am apologizing to!).

One quick question and then I'm out...

Should I be afraid that, while riding the elevator from the 8th floor down to the lobby, it descended so quickly (and noisily, I might add!!!) that it caused my ears to pop? You know, similar to the way they pop when you've, say, landed after an airplane ride...

Scary shit, friends. Eight floors or not, I think I might take the stairs tomorrow...

Ranking the Batman Flicks: Part One

With six Batman movies now in circulation, its time for me to dissect and rank several things about each movie. First up, the films themselves. I'll be covering the next subjects in subsequent posts. (For clarity's sake, the rankings will go from best to worst, kay?)

Part One: The films

1. Batman (the original, 1989). Everything about this one just worked for me. Gotham City actually felt like it was straight out of a comic book with its gothic, grandiose buildings and over-the-top architecture. The Joker's colorful wardrobe...genius (and also totally comic book-ish). Prince's soundtrack...also genius. I believed Kim Basinger as Vicki Vale and Michael Keaton and Batman. It's a classic Tim Burton flick that brought the comic version of Batman to life on the big screen for the first time. As with most series, the first film is generally the best and this one is no exception. For my money, you just can't beat this flick.

2. The Dark Knight (2008). This one came damn close to acing out the original for my fave. Its just visually amazing, but the least comic-y of them all. I love that it's shot in Chicago and that I could recognize most of the locations, although the fact that I could recognize places like Lower Wacker kinda took away from the idea that I was supposed to be looking at Gotham. But Heath Ledger's performance pretty much made up for all the scenery shortcomings. And, oh yeah, the story's a total mindfuck, too. So many layers of deep meaning to be debated over drinks at 2am...

3. Batman Begins (2005). Christian Bale as Batman....mmmmm. This one was SUPER creep-tastic and dark and, sadly, a little hard to follow the first time around. The flashbacks are all over the place, but if you find that they didn't really make sense, watch it again. It's good. VERY good. This one also sets up and introduces a lot of the characters that appear in The Dark Knight.

4. Batman Forever (1995). Not gonna lie, the story is bordering on lame, but two people make the movie for me: Jim Carrey and Val Kilmer. Both give really convincing performances (Ok, so I'm a Val Kilmer loving FOOL and I might be a little biased. SO?!) and manage to entertain despite the flimsy plot. Still, its visually amusing, though not even close to believable.

5. TIE between Batman and Robin (1997) and Batman Returns (1992). Although I LOVE Michael Keaton as Batman, George Clooney was a *joke*. Further bringing down both movies: Chris O'Donnell as Robin and Michelle Pfeiffer as the Catwoman. Lame and lamer. And The Governator? Are you kidding me?!?! I really can't find much redeeming about either of these, although Danny DeVito's Penguin, while disgusting, was well done. Meh.

Of course, these are just my opinions. If you disagree, feel free to post your thoughts in the comments.

I'll be back tomorrow to discuss Batman himself...and who portrayed the Caped Crusader best.

Holy lack of motivation tonigh, Batman!

Ok, so I finally saw The Dark Knight this weekend and it freaking blew me away. Now that there's been, what, six Batman movies, I've been thinking about ranking them in various ways, based on different things that recur in each film. I've got some good ideas, but...

...I am wiped out after a crazy weekend and just can't get it all together tonight. Look for those lists in the future, kay?

Hope everyone makes it through Monday and has a decent week. See you all soon! =)

But, but I *voted* for Will...

...lots of times Tuesday night, and I normally don't vote for reality shows at all! Unfortunately, it wasn't enough. In a stunning turn of events, Will Wingfield, the best technical dancer to ever grace the SYTYCD stage has been voted off. In my last post, I vowed to never watch the show again if Will didn't win it all, because HELLO?! No one could touch him! He was a shoe-in for the win!

Well, it's official. So You Think You Can Dance is dead to me. I don't care who wins now, but whoever does has to know deep in his or her heart that its a fluke. Will going home this early is bullshit. Plain and simple. There. I said it.

Just for shits and giggles, here's what America chose to send home tonight:

Farewell, amazingly elegant Will. Whatever company you end up with, I will pay good money to see.

Shut the front door...

No, really. The most recent installment of SYTYCD was so fabulous, I was left wanting MORE (and so far this season, that hasn't happened)!! I actually loved every number and solo, and yes, that even includes Mark and Comfort's foxtrot. Usually, I post my favorite number of the week, but with all the amazing offerings, I'm having a hell of a time deciding. Man, the choreographers really stepped up their efforts this week, and the dancers did all of the numbers justice. It was just hot.

But, before I get to all the things I LOVED, let's talk about the stuff I could have done without, shall we?

1. Chelsie's attitude. It doesn't matter how ridiculous your legs are, young lady. When your personality is so very obnoxious and rude (bordering on ugly), it cancels out all of the hotness. Seriously. Slamming the very popular, audience-friendly Joshua every chance you got was not OK. Grow up. Be professional. You're not in 6th grade homeroom anymore. Remember, SYTYCD is all about finding America's favorite dancer and you just slipped into the bottom 2, missy.

2. Nigel slamming Joshua and picking on him for his "big bum". I'm sure Mr. Nigel would be surprised to learn that women LIKE the junk in the trunk. Especially when wardrobe puts that junk in tight pants (Bless you, wardrobe). It's not funny or cool or appropriate to pick on people for their physical attributes. This isn't America's Next Top Model, for Christ's sake!

Ok, now that I've gotten that off of my chest, on to the good stuff:

1. Tabitha and Napoleon. Are they just the cutest couple EVAR or what?! Mark and Comfort's hip hop number was AMAZING (it was in the running for my favorite dance of the night...and possibly the season). But, by far, their best choreography effort was reserved for Will and Courtney. Not gonna lie...I got a little teary. So beautiful. If Will doesn't win the whole damn show, I vow never to watch again. Seriously. (I'll post the video when I can find it. Promise. It's worth the wait.)

2. WILL'S SOLO! He danced *just* like James Brown. When it was over, I was pissed. I could have watched him dance all night long. So. Entertaining.

3. Toni Basil. Ok, she used the word "street" one too many times, and she rambled a little at times but her critiques were spot on and very thoughtful. She also looked a little spacey. The fact that she couldn't focus her eyes so well, plus the rambling = good TV, right there. Airheadedness aside, "Oh Mickey" lady knows her dance. More of her and Lil' C on the judging panel, please.

4. For my favorite of the night, I've settled on this one (and trust me, it was a tough choice):

(video uploaded by tacksy. Thanks!)

Mia Michaels has kinda been on my sh*t list as of late, because she can't keep her big mouth shut and then when she tries to make it better by opening her piehole again, she just digs herself deeper and manages to look more foolish and rude, but HOLY MOSES, this number is SO good. Love the quality of Twitch's movement and double love that he is just cool as ice.

It's gonna be hard to lose anyone this week. This is where the show gets hard. I want everyone to stay, but my votes this week go to Courtney, Will and Twitch. Poor Mark, I think, will be the next to go. Bummer too. His style is SO unique. But someone's gotta go...and it better not be my Will!!

Not goin' there...

Me: "Jeez, I really need to update my f*cking blog. Its been a few days."

DJC: "Well, not with that attitude!"

He's right. Updating right now just feels forced. I have little to talk about that doesn't involve work in some aspect...and we all know how awesomely that ended for me previously, so, umm....

......yeah.

There is one thing I can share that's fairly innocuous: I think its VERY strange how people from the 7th floor come up to the floor I work on (the 8th and top floor) solely to use the bathroom. They come up via the elevators (a one-floor ride), use the bathroom and then take the elevator back to their office. I find it difficult to believe that their floor does not have adequate facilities. Why do they come up to use ours? There's nothing special about them, believe me. I just don't get it. The bathroom shenanigans in this building continue...

Got a second?

If you do, click here. Fascinating stuff. Really. =)

Happy Friday!

Project Runway Season 5: Week One

Ok. So, I finally watched the Season 5 Project Runway premier. As JZ and I discussed earlier in the day, I am excited again. YAY! Heidi looks amazing...and judging by the length of the two dresses she wore in this first episode, we'll get to see what's underneath soon! Double YAY!

As for the contestants...same people, different season. Kinda yawnable. All except for one. Our dear tanorexic Blayne.

So, last season,Christian Siriano had this thing...whenever he would talk about himself or anything that excited him, he would say, "FIERCE". He said it so much, it became his schtick...and over time, it was kinda cute. He gradually broke the souls of the American public with his fierceness over the entire course of the show. He didn't blow is fierce wad all at once.

Blayne, bless his orange little heart, used "girlicious" like 5 times in the premier episode, even going so far as to actually write it down the leg of his model. (Seriously?! Ick.)

I wonder if Blayne has seen what I consider to be the best Skeezy Coke-han flick, "Mean Girls". There's a scene where Gretchen Weiners is trying desperately to fit in and be cool by saying "That's so fetch" over and over, until finally, Regina George steps in and says, "Give it up! Fetch is never going to catch on!" Gretchen looks crushed, but she knows Regina is right.

Blayne's "girlicious" is like Gretchen's "fetch". You need to give it up, boyfriend. That shit ain't gonna catch on. That's what's up.

Decisions, decisions...

I did not watch the Season 5 Project Runway premier. Instead, I opted to ogle at Will Wingfield the gorgeous dancers on SYTYCD and record Project Runway for viewing when I get around to it. I dunno...this new season of PR...it just feels so....what's the word...contrived. Overdone. Passé. Maybe after watching the first episode, I'll feel differently and be excited to see the designers and all of the overthought, forced challenges. But for now, I am SO happy I chose to tune in to catch this:

(allow the whole thing to load, and then skip to 1:08...thanks kelxk3l!)

This is what SYTYCD calls a "Pas de Deux", or "dance for two". And technically speaking, it is. But traditionally, a pas de deux is meant to be more of a ballet style dance, with three separate phrases to it. Although achingly beautiful, I'm not sure what differentiates this piece from, say, a contemporary number. And I have to think that the producers of the show gave this one to Katee and Will on purpose, because they knew no one else on the show could pull it off. Seriously, could you see Comfort or even Kherington performing this? Talk about a massacre. I bet Nigel and Co. sat down and discussed just who could carry Desmond Richardson's incredibly difficult choreography off and settled on Will and Katee. (as an aside: in college, I used to go to every dance performance that came to Zellerbach Hall...Alvin Ailey Dance Theatre was one of my favorites, and I remember seeing Desmond back in the day. Effortlessly perfect, he was. And still is!)

Anyways, the PR premier is DVR'd and ready to go...should I ever feel like watching. On the other hand, I could watch Katee and Will all day long. =)

Monday = Good day (for once)

Today was a monumental day for yours truly. I realized that, after this month's payments, I will be 100% credit card debt free. Holy moses. This has been a LONG time coming. Almost ten years, to be exact. I will still have my car loan to contend with, but I am thrilled to finally be out of the clutches of the evil credit card companies and their oppressive interest rates. *wipes sweat from brow* Hard work, it was.

Here's the best part: One of my cards had a $1.39 balance remaining. The company (Citi who will remain nameless) was unwilling to waive the small amount. I asked the lady helping me if I could make a payment by phone. She laughed, and told me that certainly, I could...if I wanted to pay a $14.95 charge for doing so. Yeah. I think not. I'll waste a stamp and a check and mail my payment, thank you very much. Still, I had to laugh. They nickel and dime you any damn way they can. Rat bastards.

My new job is still great and I really think I'm starting to get the hang of it. YAY!

I had one hell of a workout today after a long day of sitting. It hurt, but it also felt great. Tomorrow morning may be a different story....

Anyways, it's funny how the rest of the day is just like buttah when you have a good morning. Here's to Tuesday! =)

Hey! Did you know?!

Season 5 of Project Runway premiers on Wednesday of this week, at 9pm, on Bravo. Yeah, I didn't know, either. Had I not been watching my DVR'd episodes of Shear Genius and caught one of Bravo's silly little ads, I might have missed the season all together. Even with the ads, there is very little fanfare for the new season. Designers and drama moments from past seasons were featured, with not one little snippet of any of the new designers. What gives, Bravo?

There's been a fair amount of talk as to why Bravo has chosen to not promote the latest installment as much as previous seasons (or at all, for that matter) and the cool folks at Blogging Project Runway have done an excellent job of wrangling the best conspiracy theories the 'net has to offer into one post. Scandalous, I tell you! (Hi Laura! Hi T-Bone! Hi Scarlett!)

I'm mildly excited about the new season, but there is one GLARING problem. Bravo has chosen to run their flagship reality show an hour earlier this time around. Normally, that would be just fine by me as I like to get to bed kinda early on week nights. BUT, the 9pm start time now puts my fave fashion show in direct competition with my fave dance show, and that's not OK. Thank goodness for the DVR...at least now I can watch PR without all the lame commercials and without missing a single pirouette or grande jeté. Without that piece of technology, I'd be forced to choose...and that's just not fair. In this age of excess, I want it all! (insert greedy hand-wringing here)

Anyways, I guess I'll be tuning in. I plan to put about as much energy into watching the show as Bravo put into promoting it. Whoop.

Oh. My. God. This is just exquisite. Will...bloody hell. Could he BE any more breathtaking?! I have no words. For once, I think I'm just gonna let the incredible dancing speak for itself...

Enjoy! =)

Strangest...day...EVAR!

Actually, my strange day started last night when I came home after the gym. Simply put, the entire house smelled like a toilet. BT, think of our room at the Excalibur that one year where we had raw sewage backing up in the sink. Yeah, it was like that, but minus the actual sewage. What happened, you ask? It's a looooong story, but suffice to say, there's a drain blocked somewhere below us. We were unable to open the windows due to the smell. Couple that shit stink with last night's heat, and you had two very unhappy campers in myself and DJC.

And then BAM! My vertigo came back with a vengeance. So...if you're keeping score, I was hot, dizzy , beyond tired and pissed off at the smell. Not good. I slept like shit (pardon the pun).

I arrived at work miserable but functional, thanks to Peet's double vanilla latte served up by a funky dude named Andrew. Bless you, coffee barista Andrew. Bless you.

Around lunch time, I called my mother to vent about the smell. In my efforts to climb in the car, take off my blazer, rant, bitch, and manage my purse, I left my phone on the roof of my car (although I don't remember doing this. I was yakking away on my Bluetooth headset, which are now required in California when driving). I started the car, I pulled out into traffic and continued to whine, all the while noticing the increased static I was hearing on the phone line. I sifted through my belongings in the car to find my phone, all to no avail. Then, out of the corner of my eye, just when I was getting super pissed about the staticky connection, I saw my orange LG enV phone slide off the back of my car and into the street. Holy shit. I swung my car around and drove slowly looking for the phone. When I located it, it looked like this:

_ _

Total annihilation. The funny part is that after I forced the front closed, the thing still worked! I can't see anything on the screen, but all the number keys on the inside work. So, provided that I can retrieve people's phone numbers from memory, I can still make a call. Awesome!! Thank goodness I pay for the insurance month after month. Thanks to Nilisa at Verizon, a new phone will be arriving at the office tomorrow. Nice.

Just wait. This is where things get really weird...

After the phone debacle, I returned to the office and went to the restroom in the hall. Out from under the door of the far stall popped a little, fuzzy, wuzzy dog. It caught me off guard, but whatever. Small puffy dog in the bathroom of a corporate building. Sure. Why not. Well, I went into another stall and had just sat down when the dog crept under the partition into my stall and looked up at me. I did nothing but stare back because I couldn't believe what I was seeing. After a minute of the most legit staring contest I've been involved in since grade school, the owner finally called to the pooch and it trotted happily away. Ok, seriously...W.T.F.?!?!?

Finally, tonight, as a last resort, I wobbled over to the pharmacy counter at Safeway to see if the pharmacist could suggest any over-the-counter remedies to stop the spinning in my head. Edmund Lee, Pharm. D., suggested Dramamine. Fucking Dramamine. BRILLIANT! Why hadn't I ever thought of Dramamine?!?! My god, after downing one pill, I feel almost 100%.

In conclusion, I'd like to dedicate this bizarre day to the people that made it easier for me to handle...Andrew, Nilisa, and Edmund at Safeway, here's to you all. Muchisimas gracias!! =)

Well, that's one I haven't heard before...

More than a few times over the years, I've been compared to Karen Walker from the TV show "Will and Grace". Karen is sarcastically funny, loves shoes, men, and a good stiff drink. Also, I've been told that my speech patterns bear a striking resemblance to Karen's from time to time. For those of you who used to visit my old site, you know this picture well:

So snotty, she is. Honestly, I never really minded the comparison. Actually, I love her. I think she's hilarious. I kind of embrace my Karen-ness.

Earlier today, one of my new coworkers told me about a British TV show called "The Vicar of Dibley". She did so because, apparently, I remind her of the main character, the vicar. Since I know no one is familiar with this obscure British classic (and if you are... WTF?! Seriously?!), here she is:


According to my coworker, the vicar is loud, vivacious, incredibly funny, and loves chocolate as well as a good laugh...."just like me". She then went on to describe the similarities in further detail:

"She's supposed to be good and innocent. But you can tell, there's trouble brewing behind those eyes. She's mischievous. Devious. You know...just like you."

Yep. That'll about do it. LOL.

It's worth pointing out that this coworker has known me for less than a week. Am I really that easy to read? Sheesh. ;)

Russell Crowe would not wear these

I have a burning confession to make. As a self-proclaimed shoe whore, I'm not afraid to say that I HATE the gladiator sandal trend. My good god almighty, they are ugly...and they're everywhere. It's kinda like the skinny jean trend but worse, because some people were smart enough to know that skinny jeans were heinous and shouldn't be worn. Not so with the gladiator sandal. Everyone seems to want to give these a go.

Not familiar with this unbelievably ridiculous trend? Here...take a gander:

I liken these to the Crocs phenomenon. Someone, somewhere publicly stated that Crocs, despite being designed by the Devil himself, were stylish and cool. Suddenly, Crocs were EVERYWHERE. High falutin ladies that carried small dogs in Burberry bags wore them with pride. They showed up at Nordstrom, for crying out loud! It was bad. Thankfully, Crocs' popularity has waned a bit, but I can't help think that the gladiator sandal has picked up where Crocs left off. Why are gladiator sandals cool? Because someone high up in the fashion world said they are, and because the majority of the public cannot decide for themselves, that's why. I see nothing attractive about them. And can one really get away with wearing them sans toga?

Ok, Ok. So, Russell Crowe might have worn these...but only for one movie and HELLO...it was a period piece! I really don't see where these fit in with today's current fashion.

Now, don't get me wrong. If I were forced to choose between leather strappy sandals or plastic insults to proper footwear, I'd choose the former any day. But, I still hate them. On everyone. In every style. Hopefully, they'll soon fade away into the annals of fashion, never to be heard from again. But until then, people, just say no to this silly trend. Like the skinny jean. Just walk away. Kthnxbai!

Stuff from all over

Ok, so we've got a lot to discuss tonight. First and foremost, dance. SYTYCD continued its current snooze-streak with another series of numbers that left me pretty cold...all except for both of Mia Michaels's choreography contributions. Here's the second one, featuring Twitch and Kherington in their PJs:

Oh goodness, Twitch is stunning. And I love the bedhead Kherington's got going in this one. The only negative...the excessive rose petals. The last time Twitch dropped them, it worked. All of the other throws seemed like overkill to me. The dance was gorgeous on its own. If you find yourself distracted by the flying rose petals, watch it again, and try to focus on the dancers. Lovely.

And despite the fact that I HATE the song, Will and Jessica's lyrical piece was also great. In fact, Will is my new hero. That leap at the beginning? WOW. (Thanks, as always, to kelxk3l for the uploading the vid! I don't know who you are, but you ROCK for always getting the clips up so quickly after the show. You must live on the east coast...)

Secondly, I almost feel like this news deserves its own post, but I'm just too lazy and writing about Brian Campbell is just something I can no longer devote any sort of energy to. The Sharks traded away my dear Big Bear (Steve Bernier) for the strawberry mountain man (Campbell) midseason and boy, what a flop of a trade that was. Bernier caught fire in Buffalo, while Campbell just sucked it up with the Sharks. All I can say is that the Blackhawks are a buncha chumps to cough up that much cash for an inconsistent Campbell. That said, good riddance, Soupy. LATES!!

At least five people came to my cube today to comment on my shoes, hair and clothes. Everyone stated that they all dressed like me when they started, but soon realized that the office is much more casual. Worth noting: I had trouser jeans on today...and yeah, I might have worn a pair of Beverly Feldmans, but sheesh! After my last wardrobe experience where I was constantly unprofessionally dressed, I'm not yet OK with how casual my new office is. It's OK, though...I'm sure I'll get there.

New song posted over there in the sidebar. Love this one. =)

Lastly, it happened again tonight. About two weeks ago during my Bodyflow class, I had an overwhelming urge to cry. I choked the tears down , but man, it was a strange thing for me. Crying during yoga? I've heard of such things happening, but had never experienced it. Earlier tonight, the same thing happened. I don't fully understand it, but I know it happens when we're going through the hip opening series...and I carry a TON of tension in my hips. I guess letting that go and giving in to the stretch is just an emotional thing for me. Weird shit, though.

Ok, that's it for now. Going to crash. Catch you back here soon. HUGS!

Randomness

I have so much to say about the first day of my new job, but I promised myself that I'd actually learn something from my previous crap-tastic experience with blogging about work, so we'll just leave it at this:

I have A LOT to learn...and I love it.

YAY! =)

Until things calm down a bit with the new gig, posting might be light. But SYTYCD is on tomorrow night which means I'll probably throw a vid of my fave dance up. But until then, please enjoy this throwback to the days when MTV still played music videos that featured real, actual dancing:

Back in the day, I freaking loved this video. Me and all my dancer friends played it over and over on the VCR to learn the moves. Back then, Janet was the sh*t. Whatever happened to videos like this? Damn...