Quick recap

Lately, there's been a lot going on. Here's a brief rundown so that all five of you are up to speed...

1. I'm currently taking a SUPER intensive six day medical terminology course. Its essentially an entire semester's worth of work in six days. The class is scheduled to start at 9am. In reality, the professor shows up at 9:15 or 9:25ish, and because people know he's always late, most come at 9:30 or 9:40. What this means is that the professor will wait to start class until everyone is present. While we're all waiting, he leaves the classroom. Generally the class starts everyday at about 9:45am. The professor has been teaching this class for nineteen years and he's decided that its best to give us all of the exam questions ahead of time and let us hunt and pick through the textbook for the answers. During the time while we're working, the professor leaves the room again. What this amounts to is A LOT of sitting around and playing around with my cell phone. Anyone who's taken anatomy or physiology in the last decade can answer most of the questions without looking in the textbook, but hang on, there's a catch. He wants the definitions regurgitated VERBATIM from the textbook on the exam. When I heard this, I just shook my head in disbelief. Combine this class with the English professor who wanted papers written *just so*, this has become the summer of non-learning. Laaaaaaame. Only two days left, though.

2. I bought two pairs of jeans yesterday that are both one size smaller than what I usually wear. WOOT! I owe that to the repetition of RPM and all of the other classes I take, and how many freaking calories I burn!

3. Wedding, wedding, wedding! AAAAAH! Its less than three months away! We're feverishly trying to tie up all the loose ends and figure out all the little details that I never thought I'd have to deal with. Its just nuts. But I'm super excited and will hopefully have a little more motivation to stick to my diet when my dress comes in this month. Its gonna be a good time!!

4. PA school applications are due September 1st. I've been slowly chipping away at it, but I haven't even started on my narrative yet and need to still get my letters of recommendation in order. I'm getting a little nervous about this. I don't have a plan B if I don't get in. But I guess we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

5. I've had a MONSTER cold lately and don't really feel like doing a damn thing. Studying, working, anything...its just not getting done. I can't even find enough energy to cough properly sometimes.

6. The gig at Glide's HIV Services is still going really well. We've recently set up a Facebook page to help spread the word about what we're doing there. If you haven't already visited and become a fan, this is my shameless plug and request to do so. And don't forget to suggest it to your friends (especially if they live in SF, and are MSMs, IDUs or trans-folk). Thanks!!!

Ok, I've got to head out and do something today. I think the laundry is the big winner. Ugh.

Neighborhood cats

I grew up having cats as pets. I loved how my calico cat would curl up on my lap on a rainy day and keep me warm and entertained with her hilarious personality. Alas, DJC is horribly allergic (like, more than you, BT) and can't even stand to be in the same car with a coworker who frequently has cat hair on his clothes. So, the idea of us getting a cat is out. Sad face.

I still love cats, though, and enjoy seeing various cats around the neighborhood. I sometimes take pictures of the felines that I encounter on walks or while driving somewhere. I email them to DJC because he actually likes cats, too...he just can't be around them at all. Anyways, here are some of our favorite neighborhood cats, with the names that we've given them...because we don't actually know their real names. Yes, we're those people....we rename other people's pets.

This is Neighborcat. Today was the first time we'd ever seen him, but he was super cute and meowed a lot. He seemed interested in us, but not enough to come over and allow me to pet him.

This is Paws. He is VERY skittish and doesn't like us, but hangs out in our backyard and under our cars pretty frequently. He has four white paws, hence the name.

We took a different route home today on our walk in hopes of seeing more cats. And we did. This orange one didn't even bother looking at us as we walked by, so there was no chance for me to pet it.

The first time we saw this little guy, he was up on his back paws, reaching up to a girl's hand so that she would continue petting him. We instantly called him Small Jumping Gray Cat. Today, I got to experience the jump for myself. This little guy couldn't get enough and would literally get up on his hind legs to get to my hand. He was so sweet and allowed me to pet him for about five minutes before he had enough and walked away. So sweet...and so like a cat to just walk away on his terms.

We like all of these cats just fine, but our favorites are the tortoiseshell cats that live down the street from the Small Jumping Gray Cat. At first, we only saw the super fat one, but then one day I saw TWO of them!! I had a minor freak-out and immediately stopped to take pictures. The one with the white bib is much smaller, but equally as unique and CUTE! I sometimes fantasize about stealing them. Really. DJC and I will text each other when we've seen them because we adore them so much. We're weird, I know, but just look at how cute they are:

What did we name these little cats? The fat one is Professor Socks and Nitten. Yeah, don't ask because I simply don't have an answer...I was going for Socks and MITTENS and got "nitten" instead. LOL. The name stuck. The smaller one is the white-bibbed nitten. *shrug*

Lastly, we have the black and white drooling cat. This friendly gal lives across the street from AG and sometimes I will arrive several minutes early at her house just so I can visit with this cat. If you listen closely, you can hear the purring. The drooling grosses DJC out, but my calico cat used to drool, too. I think its strangely cute.

I miss having a pet but with all these cool cats all over the neighborhood, its almost just as good. Almost...

Colores

From L to R: Dim Sum Plum, Chopsticking to My Story, the little one is What's With the Cattitude, Jade is the New Black, You Don't Know Jacques. All colors are matte.

BT can attest to the fact that I'm a bona fide nail polish junkie. My dismal academic performance during my sophomore (and possibly my junior) year of college can probably be attributed to my constant nail polishing and grooming. The colors pictured above are some of my spring/summer favorites. I'm currently sporting the green on my both my toes and fingernails. Its very different for me, but kinda cool. Dim Sum Plum is adorable on my toes. You Don't Know Jacques is a little too trendy right now and when more than two people in a day can identify it by name, I'm not likely to be using it too frequently. The green, though...its unexpected and fun.

That's all. No real point to this post. Just wanted to show off some pretty colors on a sunny day...

Bits and bobs

Yesterday, a woman in the bathroom of the downtown SF Hyatt asked me, totally seriously, if I was a plus-sized model. Them's fightin' words, ya'll. Like, srsly. But I brushed it off, because damn it, I DID look good last night. WORD. Today, a lady at the grocery store motioned to me and called me "that skinny bitch over there". Hmmm. Yesterday I was plus-sized. Today, I'm skinny, and apparently, a bitch. Well, at least she got part of it right. I guess whether I'm fat or thin very much depends on geography and the nationality of the person complimenting/insulting me. The lady who thought I was fat was white, and the one who saw me as skinny was African-American. I'm not trying to say anything here, it was just interesting...

Ummm, finals are next week. This week, I have a pathophysiology research paper to start/ finish, a schematic map of a disease process complete with drawings to start/ finish (and for those who didn't know, I can't draw for SHIT!), and a patho take-home final consisting of eleven essay questions to finish. Several of us decided we would split up the questions to make it easier on everyone, but when I read one of my classmate's answers stating that glucose gets converted into fructose in the cell (FRUCTOSE!!! Bloody hell!), I pretty much realized I'd have to do it all myself. Fuck group projects. Ugh. I have so much work to do, I'm scared to even start. Tick tock...

The rings. I picked them up from the jeweler last week. Here they are, complete with my dry, non-moisturized, wrinkly hands:


Not gonna lie, I can't stop thinking about them. When I walk by the box, I take them out, put them on and admire how damn sparkly they are. The fact that I have to wait until October to officially wear them will make it all the more special when DJC finally puts them on my finger. I'd like to think that my grandma would be pleased.

Been across the Bay Bridge lately? The "rumble strips" might be an even lamer idea than the S-curve itself. My god, Cal Trans. EPIC fail on that one!

A friend who sells Boheme wines gave us a bottle of their chardonnay to try in hopes that we might have it at our wedding. I'm not really into chards, but DAMN, this one was really good. We both loved it. Then DJC and I Googled the price. $38/ bottle. No wonder we liked it! Sheesh! That's easily the most expensive bottle of wine we've had all year. Despite the fact that its absolutely delicious, I think its safe to say that we won't be offering this to people who regularly drink Riuinite on Ice (Riunite so nice!) and wouldn't know the difference anyways.

I'm volunteering at Glide Memorial Church in SF these days. So far, I've only met with their clinic director and handed out hygiene kits on one occasion, but I'm hoping that he'll have more for me to do very soon. Its an amazing program!

That's all. Bed is calling. Like, now....

Mr. Clean Magic Eraser, I love you and hate you all at the same time

Yes, this is a picture of a floor. Whoop-dee-doo, right? Well, look a little closer and you'll see why I'm blogging about a floor. Notice any lighter, more clean tiles? Yeah, so do I every time I walk into the room. Here's how it all went down...

In light of all the freaking beer we had in the fridge and to celebrate our neighbors finally moving out, DJC and I invited a few people over last weekend. This meant some serious cleaning ahead of time. DJC spotted some scuff marks on the floor of one of our rooms where people usually congregate. He asked me if the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser could take care of them. I crouched down on the floor and began scrubbing. Sure enough, the scuffs came right up...along with god only knows how many years of dirt and grime. And then, it happened.

Once I saw the clean tiles, I couldn't stop. I scrubbed until my arm was totally fatigued and cleaned up quite a bit of schmutz. But the bad thing is that I eventually did have to stop well before I had a chance to do the whole floor. Reason 1: My arm was literally shaking. Reason 2: I completely used up the entire Magic Eraser. Reason 3: People were due any minute.

Now, our floor looks splotchier than Michael Jackson's once-black skin and face (forgive me, MJ!). I recently brought home six Magic Erasers to finish the job. I figure if I can knock out several tiles at a time over a period of a few days, I won't get burned out. But, it does have to happen. The splotchiness is killin' me! Thanks, Magic Eraser. Thanks a pantload.

In the fridge currently...

5 cans of Moose Drool Brown Ale (Note: Icky name. Decent beer)
2 cans of Ten Fidy Russian Imperial Stout from Oskar Blues
4 cans of Big Swell IPA from Maui Brewing Company
1 can of Siamese Twin Ale from Uncommon Brewers
1 12oz bottle of Aprihop from Dogfish Head
2 12 oz bottle of Mission Street IPA from Trader Joe's.
1 24 oz bottle of Bear Republic XP Pale Ale
1 24 oz bottle of Wilco Tango Foxtrot Ale from Lagunitas
1 24 oz bottle of Green Flash Imperial IPA
Half a bottle of Chalone Vineyard Chardonnay- probably should be thrown out.
Half a bottle of Spinyback Sauvignon Blanc- Ditto here. Didn't even know we had this as it was in the WAY back.

This is after I polished off a 4 pack of Allagash White Ale this weekend and DJC drank various bottles of his swill of choice. Rumor has it that there are at least 12 bottles of Session Black Lager from Full Sail on their way to the fridge later today. Damn ya'll...that's A LOT of alcohol. After I came home from the grocery store today and could barely fit a bag of salad in there, I knew I had to take stock of what was occupying all the space.

And yes, I sat in front of the open fridge while I cataloged its contents and didn't care how much energy I was wasting. My dad would be so disappointed. Hee-hee!

I joined the current century!!

I finally broke down and bought a new phone. It was time. In a sea of uber-connected Twitter, Gmail, and Facebook mobile freaks, I believe I was the lone hold-out. My old phone was good for two things: Making actual phone calls and sending old school text messages. No music. No Youtube. No tweeting. It had a camera, but I can't say I used it all that frequently. I was, as my sister kindly put it, living in the stone age. Not that I was terribly bothered, though. For whatever reason, I just could never pull the trigger on a new smartphone.

But this past weekend, in a drunken, no-neighbors-in-site, euphoric haze, I gave in and upgraded. My carrier, Verizon, offers a "new every two" program, where they give you a $50 credit towards a new phone every two years. I had not upgraded in nearly three years. I checked the available phones online and found that they were offering the Palm Pre Plus for the bargain price of $49.99. With my credit, the phone was free. WOOT! Free is good, especially when you're hesitant to buy a new phone in the first place.

(A tip to Verizon folks...if you're in the market for a new phone, NEVER buy one in the store. Whatever you're looking for is almost always cheaper if you buy online. Verizon sometimes offers ludicrous online discounts of $100 or more for some phones. Yes, the instant gratification of holding new things in your hands is hard to resist, but if you can wait a day to have it shipped overnight, which they'll do for free, its always a better deal to buy online. My new Palm would have set me back $150 even after the discount had I purchased it in-store. You're welcome!)

Anyways, my gorgeous little phone arrived today. Ever since I picked it up, I've been confused. After spending nearly 40 minutes on the phone with customer support trying to get the thing programmed, I then had to set up a Palm profile, and sit through a five minute video demo/intro. There's nothing like outdated technology (and the Palm is outdated already) to make you feel like a total moron! Thank goodness for DJC who has managed to figure out more about my phone's inner workings in 30 minutes than I was able to work out all day. Awesome.

All in all, though, I'm very happy. I've got 16GB of flash memory to fill with all kinds of stuff, a Facebook app, Gmail, Google Maps and a bunch of other cool things to play with. In time, I will get more comfortable and feel less technically inept. Wonder if they have a Blogger app...

Looking back

2009 was an interesting one for me. I didn't have an actual job for the entire year. By choice. Instead, I spent my time in various classes, fulfilling various requirements, learning new and interesting things and refreshing my knowledge bank. I tried my best. I submitted applications for nursing programs that will hopefully allow me to one day have a job that I love...again. I continued to cheer for the Cal Bears football team, and continued to be let down...just like every other year. I worked out harder than I have since college, but sadly, with less results. DJC and I celebrated our fifth year together, and started making plans for our wedding this year (YAY!!). I bought my wedding dress. As a couple, we grew closer than ever and faced a number of very difficult challenges together. We traveled, although not all that far. We ate lots. We laughed endlessly. We cried. He dried my tears. We made the best of the situation. Somehow, we've managed not to kill our downstairs neighbors and have resolved to allow them to upset us less. We're going to do our best to simply ignore their pathetic presence (although currently, I can hear exactly what video game the shitlets are playing as well as their fat little squeals of glee from time to time) and do the things that make us happy. I kissed my parents goodbye and hoped that their road trip across the country was uneventful and their new life in Florida makes them truly happy. I miss them. Terribly. I've read a lot. I've written a lot. I started a reality TV blog with my best friend from the seventh grade and had a wonderful lunch with her after not seeing each other for close to 20 years. Thanks to the wonders of Facebook, I connected with tons of long lost friends...and even made a few new ones.

All in all, I can't complain. 2009 wasn't the greatest year ever, but it wasn't terrible, either. I can't wait to see how all of the decisions and choices I made in 2009 work out for me in 2010. I can't wait to be Mrs. DJC. However things may go, I feel positive and excited to see what the future holds. I'd just like to finally root for a winning college football team for once. How about it, Bears? Can you make all my dreams come true? ;)

My current stream of consciousness...

Finals. Stress. More arithmetic than I ever thought I'd have to do after leaving 4th grade...sans calculator. Stress. Headache. Sore shoulders and neck. 3 hours of hell and no time left over to check my math. Divot in my finger from holding the pencil too tightly. Hardest class I will probably ever have to take...even when I get into nursing school. Whether I feel good about my efforts or not, its over. Hope I passed. Not gonna lie...I hated every single moment of this class. Don't want to take it again. Ever. For any reason.

Now, Anthony Bourdain in Sardinia. Delicious looking foods. Fire-roasted cheeses. Fresh pastas and sauces. Cured meats. Mouth watering. Bubble bath soon. Sleep...perhaps soundly. Hopefully soundly. Dream of fire-roasted cheeses and house wines. Mmmm...

Tomorrow, the feverish studying will resume for Thursday's exam. Multiple choice. Infinitely comforting multiple choice. The answer's there somewhere. When it doubt, you've got a one-in-four chance. Pick C. Always C. Almost finished. Light at the end of the tunnel is almost visible. One more Starbuck's caramel brulee latte and one more lecture before the exam. Remember to buy two Scan-trons! Hang in there!

After finals, off to Wisconsin. Hellishly cold Wisconsin. Fun. Not. I'll blog if I can. Ugh.

Figure skating originality FAIL

Here I am, sitting on my new couch, dressed in fleece, sweats and Uggs, eating a chocolate croissant and ready to catch up on several days' worth of DVRed goodness. So many trashy shows to watch! Whatever will I choose first?!

But alas, I made the mistake of checking to see what else was on TV before diving in. And I found a figure skating competition. Its a little known fact that I am an absolute SUCKER for figure skating. And with the 2010 Winter Olympics right around the corner, there's a ton of figure skating to be had on TV these days. Cool! But as the top female Russian competitor took the ice, I became frustrated. Here's the thing:

There's a world FULL of amazing music out there. Why must every freaking female skater for the last 20+ years use Bizet's "Carmen"?! I mean, seriously. There are only so many ways it can be done, and no one can really do it better than Katerina Witt in the 1988 Olympics:

I think the ice skating code of points should be officially revised to ban "Carmen" from ever being used again in any competition. My god. Since Witt's gold medal performance, anyone and everyone has tried to re-capture her magic. Its just soooooooooooo painfully overused! Hell, Beyonce even starred in an MTV atrocity of pop-culture called "Carmen: A Hip-Hopera". This stratospherically bad display of horseshit also starred Lil' Bow Wow. Based on that fact alone, the graceful, elegant sport of figure skating should shun "Carmen" from competition use forever and ever, amen.

That's all. I'm done ranting now. I just wish skaters didn't play it safe with such an unoriginal, yet beautiful, piece of music. Taking the easy way out never pays off. Pick some different music, for crying out loud.

Sometimes, my commute doesn't suck all that much

I was on my way home from class today, angry that I could have gotten an extra nine points on my most recent exam had I only given my answers in the correct units (damn it!), when it started to rain. "Big whoop," I thought. It had been raining all day. At times, the ferocity of the downpour was such that seeing through the windshield became difficult.

But on the way home, the sun broke through the thick grayness while the rain came down steadily creating a gorgeous full rainbow. Luckily, I glanced over, smiled, and then immediately grabbed my camera. Note that I took the pic through my window which was covered in rain drops. If you look closely, the beginning of a second rainbow is there, too. Pretty cool. It definitely snapped me out of my angry funk. Suddenly, sitting in traffic wasn't so bad.

Good thing I always carry my camera with me...

Apparently, I've been doing it all wrong...

Our dryer is currently on the fritz. I can wash clothes at the house, I just can't dry them. And I refuse to call the service company again, because we're always the ones who have to call. Otherwise, as evidenced by the fact that it remained broken for close to four months, it doesn't get fixed. But we still need clean clothes. Even though I hate the laundromat with the fire of a thousand suns, off I went today...

As I dragged my heavy bag of dirty stuff over to the single-load washers and started unloading, an old man in the corner barked at me, "You're wasting your money doing it that way". Ummm, OK. Whatever, old guy. I told him that I was doing juuuust fine and continued doing my thing. I walked out of the laundromat to get a Vitamin Water and when I came back, old guy came over and said, "You're overloading my washers! You're burning up the motors in my machines, kid!". It was then that he introduced himself as the owner of the laundromat. I felt like an ass for brushing him off earlier.

He explained that I should be using the larger capacity washers for the amount of clothes I had to do. I admitted that I was a bit intimidated by those things and didn't really know how to use them or how much soap to put in. As he paraded me around from machine to machine, I got a fifteen minute tutorial on how to operate the 25, 40 and 60 pound washers . He informed me that I've been "doing it all wrong". After his convincing lesson, I concurred. I will try it his way next time. Old guy was super nice, friendly and was just interested in helping me out.

Strange side note: As I was waiting for my clothes to dry, I noticed a super slim Asian man wearing plaid shorts, a contrasting striped shirt and sandals. Whatever, I thought...after all, it's laundry day. But then, for whatever reason, I looked at his feet. He had possibly the BEST pedicure I've ever seen, complete with shiny navy blue nail polish (not unlike my own) and red and white flowers that were hand painted on, no doubt. The nails were longer, but very evenly filed. So weird. Didn't see that one coming at all. LOL! Gotta love the laundromat.

Just your typical bay area Saturday afternoon

It was supposed to rain this weekend. I love it when the meteorologists are wrong. On my way to pick up some new nail polish at the local beauty supply store, I drove by the beach and saw this:

Alameda beach with San Francisco and the Bay Bridge in the distance...

Two kitesurfers with Sutro Tower in between...

Super zoomed in close up of one of the kitesurfers...

Alameda beach is always pretty windy and on Saturday afternoon, there were so many kites in the sky that I had to stop and watch for a little while. The pedicure I was going to give myself could wait. I stood with my toes in the water and and a smile on my face as I watched numerous kitesurfers come out of the water and then attempt to walk their kites back down the beach. In the wind, it was difficult and required two people most of the time.

It was a gorgeous day. Not a single rain cloud in sight. (Make sure to click on the pics to see the larger versions. They're worth it.)

Dogs EVERYWHERE!!

DJC and I went out to Danville tonight. He was in serious need of a haircut and the only lady that he trusts with his locks is located in a shop situated smack in the middle of what he calls "Status Symbol Lane". Visiting Danville is always an adventure, even though I grew up there.

Since my parents still live in the area, we've been known to frequent this area of town for weekend brunches outside in the sunshine. On any given day, we've seen some of the most *ridiculous* mid-life crisis cars driven by men who are clearly too old to properly enjoy them. I liken it to renting a Ferrari in Las Vegas and then only driving it up and down the Strip...ya know, just to be seen in it. They don't actually drive them into the ground they way they should or even push the gas pedal down enough to get the motor purring. Its a shame.

Anyways... tonight, Status Symbol Lane was overtaken by THOUSANDS of canines. You see, tonight was Danville Doggie Night, where owners bring their four-legged friends to a place called Molly's Pup-purr-ee (I can't make this shit up, folks) for a gathering of people and pets. No matter which way I turned, there were dogs, dogs and MORE DOGS...little Chihuahuas, Great Danes and everything in between. I took pics of my favorites:


This is Kiley, a 3 year old adorably poofy Chow Chow. She was totally kicking back outside the local Starbucks, just chillin'. I rubbed her head and ears for about 5 minutes and she was possibly the *softest* thing I have ever touched in my whole life.

This is Sampson, a 6 month old Akita, whose owner was also getting a haircut in the same salon where DJC was. He sat patiently and quietly during the whole cutting process...right up until the girl cutting his owner's hair took him to the back for a rinse. Once his owner was out of sight, Sampson got a little edgy and started barking, but when his owner returned, he jumped up and down in delight. Such an adorable puppy...such HUGE paws.

This was definitely the strangest thing I have ever seen in Danville, but Drew's hairstylist had it right when she said that its good for the community and great for local businesses. And these days, I'm all for anything that stimulates the economy, even if the town of Danville has no idea what the word "recession" means.

The great slipcover debacle of 2009

Our living room couch is ugly. I mean REALLY ugly. It was once green "leather". It's now a sorry shade of grayish green that is most certainly cannot be found in Crayola box. DJC and I have considered investing in a new couch for some time, but with me being in school and not working, our only option was to buy a fairly expensive stretch slipcover and suck it up for a little longer. Luckily, Target had a sale on slipcovers this weekend. I jumped without looking, apparently.

We decided on a lovely (not so much, actually) shade of brown called "oar" and anxiously drove home to give it a shot. Thankfully, the package included directions and markers on the front and back center, and the arms to ensure correct alignment. DJC and I placed the cover over top of the couch, lined up the seams and according to the instructions, tucked. And tucked. And pulled. And stretched. And cursed. And tucked. There seemed to be no limit to how much the fabric would stretch! Pretty soon, both of us were a little out of breath and visibly sweating. How'd the couch look? Wrinkled. And wonky. Covered and somewhat better, but wonky.

So, we removed the slipcover entirely and decided to take another swing at it. We followed the directions very closely and resumed tucking and pulling, more tucking, more sweating, infinitely more cursing and still more tucking. The result? I can live with this attempt. The couch looks pretty good. Not perfect, but OK.

Then I sat down. All that hard work...GONE! Gone as soon as I planted my ass on the velvety soft fabric! NOOOOOOOOO! As nice as the cover has made the couch and the room look, I think it's going to be a hell of a lot more work than its worth to keep it looking like an elephant didn't just sit on it.

Has anyone ever tackled one of these before? Any tips you'd care to share? Please. Help me. I feel like I'm drowning in yards of stretchy fabric....

Back in action...almost.

I'm home after a strange trip to Amish-land. I have PLENTY to tell ya'll about, but I just haven't found the time to upload the necessary pics and gather my thoughts. But the stories are coming, I promise. Some highlights to look forward to:

-The HELLISH red eye flight that we took to get out there. Let me just say, I got not one fucking wink of sleep.

-Taking my cousin to the ER and dealing with possibly the MOST INCOMPETENT "doctor" I have ever come across. I hesitate to even call him a doctor. "No talent ass clown" would have been more appropriate. Now that I think about it, the douchebag that has been taking care of my grandma is less than qualified to call himself a doctor, too. Just. Horrid.

-My sister and I learning the secret family recipe for the beloved Russian holiday nutroll. That's right, bitches. I baked. And I KICKED ASS at it! What now?!

-My little second cousins (all 5 of them) and their very different personalities and how everyone around them bent over backwards to keep them from losing their shit, which can happen at any time, for any reason, without any sort of warning. It was brutal, but REALLY good birth control.

-My sister and I visited the famed Quaker Steak and Lube. Many drinks and appetizers were consumed between the two of us. The final price of our excursion will shock you. Srsly.

-The five minute Brazilian I got today. Ok, so this didn't happen in western, Amish, prude, uber- religious PA, but holy shit on a stick! The whole thing literally took only five minutes from beginning to end. FIVE!!! AMAZING! I didn't even have time to complain about the pain. I figured it was worth mentioning. Thanks, Christina!! Now back to your regularly scheduled Pennsylvania updates...

-A ton of random pics of all sorts of things. I've got lots...and I'm not afraid to post them. Word.

Ok, I'll be back soon with lots of crapola to keep you entertained. Stay tuned...

Vacay

I'll be in rural Pennsylvania for the next few days visiting family. My one remaining, awesome grandma is turning 96 and is still as ornery as ever. And you wonder where I get it...

Anyways, I'm not sure what the internet status will be up there, so posting may be a little light. I'm hoping for a Starbucks with wi-fi, but the last time I was in this particular part of Pennsylvania, I saw an Amish horse-drawn carriage heading into town. The people inside were wearing bonnets. No shit.

In other news, I'm sure that if I wanted to improve my butter-churning skills, I'd have no trouble finding a class or two, so there's that. And alcohol. Lots of alcohol. Sweet, sweet alcohol.

Talk to you all when I get back! Cheers! =)

Testing...Testing...

No, I'm not ignoring you....I promise. I have two midterms this week and I'm a little behind in the studying department. I'm trying to play catch up

The pharmacology exam will go well. It always does because I'm actually interested in the material. Communications, on the other hand, is a joke. Here's how a typical class goes:

Each class ends with the "professor" assigning the weekly reading, which is generally the next chapter in the lamest textbook on Earth. The following week, we come in and immediately have the most micro-managed quiz I've ever experienced on the previous week's reading. Then, we spend the next THREE HOURS discussing exactly what we read and were just quizzed on. The "professor" has overheads (!!!) and all of her examples of the concepts come straight from the textbook. Zero imagination. And to top it all off, it's a communications class where we're supposed to learn the samurai ways of the competent communicator...and yet, more than half the people in the class can't speak passable English. It's a tough 3 hours, let me tell you.

I expect the midterm to be nothing more than textbook and vocab regurgitation into a blue book. Word vomit earns you points. Hope the "professor" can read my handwriting....

I'll be back after Thursday. Wish me luck!! =)

Calesthenics...Obama style

I'm currently watching our new President's speech, and I can't help but wonder...

...Were the men and women in Congress prepared for the leg work out they're getting tonight? Up, down, up, down, cheer, hoot, holler, up, down, up, down. On and on it goes. Not that I disagree with what the most articulate President of our time has to say. I'm as enamored and as captivated as the next guy, but sheesh, all that standing and sitting and standing and sitting has got to be a little tiring and hard on the old, creaky knees, don'tcha think?

And as much as I LOVE her, can someone please teach Nancy Pelosi how to clap? It's waaaay too rhythmic and looks a little robotic. And honey, that shirt!! That design on the front!! That color!! Ooof! No. No. NO.

Where technology pisses me off

I hate Twitter. I hate the word "Twitter". I hate that people subscribing to each other's "tweets" (which is a word I totally hate) aren't called "friends" but "followers". I hate that some of my actual friends have linked their stupid Twitter accounts with their Facebook accounts, such that anytime they "tweet" (Oh God, I can feel the chunks rising), their Facebook status has a bunch of random @ and # signs in the text, making the update completely unreadable. And I especially HATE that Twitter seems to be everywhere lately. Everyone who's anyone has a Twitter account with numerous followers. Some people tweet (barf!) four to five times a day to update their followers on every aspect of their incredibly important lives. I just think the whole thing is incredibly lame and way more self- indulgent than traditional blogs. I refuse to jump on board.

That is all.