Monday, January 25, 2010

More laundormat insanity

The scene: the less than awesome laundromat, right after lunch. The place is packed. PACKED. Its hot, damp, and loud. So loud. Whoop.

Me: No makeup, chipped nail polish, hair wet from the rain, velour pants, black Uggs. So. Not. Hot.

Him: Receding hair line, cargo shorts and flip-flops despite the rain, cell phone permanently attached to his ear, can't stop looking at me. Really. Kinda icky.

Finally, homeboy makes his move. As I'm folding my laundry (and DJC's) directly from the dryer, he slides up next to me, gets my attention, and says, "You've got nice legs and a great ass. Wanna get a drink sometime?"

I think my mouth might have fallen open. Despite the sheer hilarity of the dude's comments, there are several very pressing issues that I feel I need to discuss:

First, did he miss the very shiny ring on my left hand? I feel like people of his age (roughly mid 30s), look for the ring before making such a ridiculous stab at my "great ass". For all I know, he saw my ring and just didn't care. Whatever the case, EW.

Secondly, and far more importantly, ring or no ring, did he think that line would actually work? I'm afraid he thought it would. In a laundromat. While I'm clearly folding a man's polo shirt. Good lord.

The funny thing was that I was SUPER embarrassed by the whole exchange. Its not often that I hear compliments about my hind quarters from strangers. Its not like either are my best feature. I think I may have turned eight different shades of red. Thankfully, I quickly dispatched the weird stranger and continued to fold underwear and socks.

There are times when I'm happy about being able to wash and dry four loads of laundry in about ninety minutes, but today was not one of them. Oh, who am I was totally hysterical.

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