Saturday, September 5, 2009

Adventures at the local Safeway

College football starts today, which means that I needed provisions. Food, drink and the like. I put on my script Cal t-shirt and headed out to the grocery store.

As I stepped up to the meat counter, I was immediately greeted by the largest, happiest man I have seen in a long time. His name, according to his name tag, was Eric.

"May I help you on this fiiiiiiiiine day?", Eric asked me.

"Yes please. I'd like six slices of bacon.", I replied.

"SLICES?! I thought you were going to ask me for six pounds!!

"Well, I would get more, but I don't think we could eat it all and I certainly don't want to waste good bacon."

"Girl, please. I can handle six of these slices on my own!"

"Actually, I can too, but I really shouldn't. I do love me some bacon, though."

"Child, please. You're skinny! Unless you're pushing 225 on the scale, you're skinny in my mind!"

I laughed. I'm not sure when I was last told that I am skinny. Serious comedy. Eric happily packed up my half-pound of bacon and added a "Thank you, Jesus" when he handed it to me. In this context, it made perfect sense. I continued to smile as I walked away from the meat counter towards the beer aisle.

Once there, I encountered three guys all dressed in Cal gear. They immediately saw my t-shirt and hollered "GO BEARS!". I returned the chant, although not nearly as loudly.

"So are you going to the game?", one guy asked me.

"No, we're gonna watch it on TV", I replied, as I surveyed the beer choices.

"Yeah, its on ESPN2...". Immediately, I cut in.

"Which kinda sucks because I feel that ESPN never gives the Pac-10 the respect is deserves. Plus the game will not be in HD. Weak".

All three of them looked at me like I had just said the most amazing thing they had ever heard. We continued to chit-chat about how the national sports channels favor the east coast teams and how its total bullshit that one ESPN guy actually chose Maryland over Cal. We agreed that Cal would shut them up with their actions on the field. The conversation then turned to the Navy Ohio State game that had taken place earlier in the day. After about five minutes, I went on my way. They all looked a little sad as I walked out of the beer aisle and gave me one more "GO BEARS!".

Damn, I love Cal fans. GO BEARS!!!

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